I know at some point I posted that I was applying for the Leadership Greater Enid thing, but I don't remember if I ever said anything else about it. My application was accepted and the first big thing was this weekend. We left yesterday morning and headed to Camp Redlands by Stillwater to participate in some team building stuff and a ropes course. The morning was the typical warm fuzzy getting to know you stuff and it was fun. But there was one exercise that made me want to shoot people. We already knew about my lack of patience, so that wasn't a big surprise, lol.
The afternoon brought the ropes course. I was fine on the ground but when I got up there - yeah, not so much. I had to climb up a pole which wasn't as easy as it looked, then had to walk across a log (way up in the air, by the way). Then I had to climb up to a small platform and walk across a cable while holding on to cables on either side of me. Um, that sucked. A lot. They were flippin' wobbly and I was thinking I would never make a good Indiana Jones at this point. So here's where I became terrified. I was shaky which just made the cables shaky. I made it across that and then the next one was even worse. It was loops made of cables that we had to step across, so you get one foot out there on one and one foot behind you on the other and let's just say, I didn't think my legs would split that much. Jeez. That one was the worst and about half way through it I was ready to bail. But I was thinking to myself, "I cannot quit. I have had 4 babies. I have spent the night in haunted prisons and tuberculosis sanitariums. I can do this. Plus, I can't tell Marty I quit." So I caught my breath and went to the end. It was freakin' MISERABLE. The instructor asked if I wanted to come down. Fuck yes, I wanted to come down. But I said not yet. So the next thing was another log, but it was on an incline, so you had to walk up this log and at the end, jump across NOTHING to another platform. Did that. Then the last thing was a cable that you had to go across sideways while holding on to some flimsy ass ropes. I just closed my eyes and went. I opened my eyes and thought, wow, I am as high as the trees. It was pretty cool, but I was still dying. I got a few feet from the end and my guiderope felt like it was stuck and I was like, crap, I'm at the end and can't go anywere, but I made it to the last platform where they unhooked me and hooked me up to a zipline. He said, "OK, just push off whenever you're ready." HA. I wasn't ever going to be ready to bail off of a platforrm 30 feet in the air. Was this guy new??? So I sat there for a minute, glad I hadn't once uttered the F word or wet myself, closed my eyes, and bailed off and went zooming off into the trees. WHEW. I shook for like an hour after that and was seriously fighting the tears because it was THE most horriffic thing I have ever done. But I was glad that I did it. I would have been so mad at myself if I hadn't. Plus Marty would have given me shit, and that was a big motivation :).
So for the warm fuzzy what I learned from this - that no matter how much I think I just cannot go one one more inch, I can manage to eke out more. Hell, now I've had babies AND completed a ropes course. I'll take having babies over the ropes any day. Without drugs even.
It was nice to have some of my friends and my dad there encouraging me. I made the comment that had it not been for them I wasn't sure I would have made it. I guess that's the whole point - to trust people you don't know, but I don't know that I could have done it. A lot of the people there didn't know anyone else, so I felt incredibly lucky to have people that loved me there, let alone people that I knew. Everyone was like "you did great" and all that and I was thinking yeah, if you call shaking like a leaf and wanting to cry like a little girl great, OK. Someone made a comment to me about me having a lot of self confidence and I can tell you that up there I was feeling about as unconfident as I ever have. I wish I hadn't freaked out, but it did refresh that mind over matter is what it's all about. That's something I preach and try to live by, but that stuff more or less goes out the window when you're 30 feet in the air hanging on to wiggly cables.
After all that, we had dinner together and then several of us went out for drinks and to watch our Pokes get their asses kicked. Suffice it to say it was a long night and way too much fun. And way too many drinks.
We had a speaker this morning and it was good, but I was SO tired and sore. I have sore muscles in places I didn't know I used. Plus, after staying up so late, I couldn't sleep, thus I was exhausted today. We got home and I crashed for about 6 hours.
I had a good time, met new people, made some new friends, and challenged myself to do something I didn't think I could do. The whole thing was a challenge on a lot of levels - you have no idea what you will do in that kind of situation until you are smack in the middle of it. I'm glad I did it.
We were encouraged to journal about it, so there ya go.
The afternoon brought the ropes course. I was fine on the ground but when I got up there - yeah, not so much. I had to climb up a pole which wasn't as easy as it looked, then had to walk across a log (way up in the air, by the way). Then I had to climb up to a small platform and walk across a cable while holding on to cables on either side of me. Um, that sucked. A lot. They were flippin' wobbly and I was thinking I would never make a good Indiana Jones at this point. So here's where I became terrified. I was shaky which just made the cables shaky. I made it across that and then the next one was even worse. It was loops made of cables that we had to step across, so you get one foot out there on one and one foot behind you on the other and let's just say, I didn't think my legs would split that much. Jeez. That one was the worst and about half way through it I was ready to bail. But I was thinking to myself, "I cannot quit. I have had 4 babies. I have spent the night in haunted prisons and tuberculosis sanitariums. I can do this. Plus, I can't tell Marty I quit." So I caught my breath and went to the end. It was freakin' MISERABLE. The instructor asked if I wanted to come down. Fuck yes, I wanted to come down. But I said not yet. So the next thing was another log, but it was on an incline, so you had to walk up this log and at the end, jump across NOTHING to another platform. Did that. Then the last thing was a cable that you had to go across sideways while holding on to some flimsy ass ropes. I just closed my eyes and went. I opened my eyes and thought, wow, I am as high as the trees. It was pretty cool, but I was still dying. I got a few feet from the end and my guiderope felt like it was stuck and I was like, crap, I'm at the end and can't go anywere, but I made it to the last platform where they unhooked me and hooked me up to a zipline. He said, "OK, just push off whenever you're ready." HA. I wasn't ever going to be ready to bail off of a platforrm 30 feet in the air. Was this guy new??? So I sat there for a minute, glad I hadn't once uttered the F word or wet myself, closed my eyes, and bailed off and went zooming off into the trees. WHEW. I shook for like an hour after that and was seriously fighting the tears because it was THE most horriffic thing I have ever done. But I was glad that I did it. I would have been so mad at myself if I hadn't. Plus Marty would have given me shit, and that was a big motivation :).
So for the warm fuzzy what I learned from this - that no matter how much I think I just cannot go one one more inch, I can manage to eke out more. Hell, now I've had babies AND completed a ropes course. I'll take having babies over the ropes any day. Without drugs even.
It was nice to have some of my friends and my dad there encouraging me. I made the comment that had it not been for them I wasn't sure I would have made it. I guess that's the whole point - to trust people you don't know, but I don't know that I could have done it. A lot of the people there didn't know anyone else, so I felt incredibly lucky to have people that loved me there, let alone people that I knew. Everyone was like "you did great" and all that and I was thinking yeah, if you call shaking like a leaf and wanting to cry like a little girl great, OK. Someone made a comment to me about me having a lot of self confidence and I can tell you that up there I was feeling about as unconfident as I ever have. I wish I hadn't freaked out, but it did refresh that mind over matter is what it's all about. That's something I preach and try to live by, but that stuff more or less goes out the window when you're 30 feet in the air hanging on to wiggly cables.
After all that, we had dinner together and then several of us went out for drinks and to watch our Pokes get their asses kicked. Suffice it to say it was a long night and way too much fun. And way too many drinks.
We had a speaker this morning and it was good, but I was SO tired and sore. I have sore muscles in places I didn't know I used. Plus, after staying up so late, I couldn't sleep, thus I was exhausted today. We got home and I crashed for about 6 hours.
I had a good time, met new people, made some new friends, and challenged myself to do something I didn't think I could do. The whole thing was a challenge on a lot of levels - you have no idea what you will do in that kind of situation until you are smack in the middle of it. I'm glad I did it.
We were encouraged to journal about it, so there ya go.
