Christina, my college roommate, will remember this, no one else probably will, but there needs to be a reinvention of the Feared Jamaican Voodoo Posse. Our mantra was "We are evil, you must die." Some of you will get it, others won't. I'm betting the gun toters and the ones married to rockstars with fears of aliens will. Although, you can't be a member of the Feared Jamaican Voodoo Posse and keep your shit locked in the attic, hooker. What good does that do ya during a home (or alien) invasion?
I agree with Smart Bitch's blog. If we all packed heat, there would be a lot less senseless shootings in the world because people would shoot back. BUT on the other hand, if I carried all the time, I would be liable to just shoot someone in the face when she looked at me stupid and told me my two year old was hurting her ears in the department store, so I don't know if that is such a grand idea. Ya'll know me and my tendency for hissy fits, so I don't know that having a firearm handy is really smart in my situation. I do think it would curb people just out and out being stupid though. Because as it stands, people just have some stupid stuff come out of their face sometimes and if you were able to just pull a handgun on someone every time they said something stupid, I bet there'd be a lot less of that. Not shooting them, just pulling it out, that would be enough to make someone think twice.
OK, I don't know why I am in a particularly violent mood lately. That's a lie, yes I do.
Last night I almost lost my mind on my children. I took all 4 of them to Wal Mart (stupid) and they just kept touching things. We went through a drive through and the three year old always decides that's the opportune time to SCREAM, so I gave up and didn't get to order myself anything, then when we got home, he stole the 10 year old's cinnamon crisp thing so she chases him down to get it back, she gets mad at him, and chunks it on the floor, breaking it into a million tiny pieces. On the floor that I just paid someone $65 to clean my house all day. I came unwound. Why do brilliant children become retarded like that? Is it the fast food? Maybe. Yeah, I know, I may feed my kids crap but they go on cool trips and stay in haunted hotels, so it makes up for it.
Then today I am trying like hell to find some guardianship papers I typed up, can't find them anywhere, so I call the court clerk and ask if I can come get a copy of the file. She says no, only the attorney can. I tell her it's Jennifer's case. She says Jennifer has to come copy them. I tell her I TYPED THEM in the first place, I just don't have them anymore. No. Jesus. Whatever. That has contributed a bit to my violent mood. That kind of crap crawls on me. I cannot come over and get a copy of the papers I myself personally created that I bet my name is even the notary on. RETARDED.
So, Amanda, that is why I did not leave a comment on your blog, I had too much to say.
So who's in for the Feared Jamaican Voodoo Posse? Monty?
I agree with Smart Bitch's blog. If we all packed heat, there would be a lot less senseless shootings in the world because people would shoot back. BUT on the other hand, if I carried all the time, I would be liable to just shoot someone in the face when she looked at me stupid and told me my two year old was hurting her ears in the department store, so I don't know if that is such a grand idea. Ya'll know me and my tendency for hissy fits, so I don't know that having a firearm handy is really smart in my situation. I do think it would curb people just out and out being stupid though. Because as it stands, people just have some stupid stuff come out of their face sometimes and if you were able to just pull a handgun on someone every time they said something stupid, I bet there'd be a lot less of that. Not shooting them, just pulling it out, that would be enough to make someone think twice.
OK, I don't know why I am in a particularly violent mood lately. That's a lie, yes I do.
Last night I almost lost my mind on my children. I took all 4 of them to Wal Mart (stupid) and they just kept touching things. We went through a drive through and the three year old always decides that's the opportune time to SCREAM, so I gave up and didn't get to order myself anything, then when we got home, he stole the 10 year old's cinnamon crisp thing so she chases him down to get it back, she gets mad at him, and chunks it on the floor, breaking it into a million tiny pieces. On the floor that I just paid someone $65 to clean my house all day. I came unwound. Why do brilliant children become retarded like that? Is it the fast food? Maybe. Yeah, I know, I may feed my kids crap but they go on cool trips and stay in haunted hotels, so it makes up for it.
Then today I am trying like hell to find some guardianship papers I typed up, can't find them anywhere, so I call the court clerk and ask if I can come get a copy of the file. She says no, only the attorney can. I tell her it's Jennifer's case. She says Jennifer has to come copy them. I tell her I TYPED THEM in the first place, I just don't have them anymore. No. Jesus. Whatever. That has contributed a bit to my violent mood. That kind of crap crawls on me. I cannot come over and get a copy of the papers I myself personally created that I bet my name is even the notary on. RETARDED.
So, Amanda, that is why I did not leave a comment on your blog, I had too much to say.
So who's in for the Feared Jamaican Voodoo Posse? Monty?
1 comments:
I walk through most stores repeating, "don't touch anything." Have been doing it for nine years straight now, constantly, in every store. The answer to every question in every store is an automatic "no." Most of the time, I don't even hear the question. Maybe that is why my otherwise intelligent son does stupid things, he knows if he asks, I'm going to say "no."
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